A cautionary tale, or Hang up and park.

I recently talked about how, in some ways, I've become like my Mother in this post. I mentioned briefly how that fact can be a great thing, but focused more on some of the minorly negative aspects so I thought I would spend a bit more time on the good things about Judy.

I mean, I hope she knows how much I love and admire her. I tell her I love her every time we talk on the phone which, admittedly, isn't as often as it should be. But I freely admit to that particular character flaw.

I wish I was more like her in all the good ways. Seriously. The woman volunteered for so many things at church; and still does, made clothes for us, sewed curtains for the whole house, and when the time came, nursed her Grandmother and then her Mother through their final years, and then months, without complaint.
All of this while working as a nurse and Lactation Consultant, and eventually, caring for Grankids.
Goodness knows she prays for everyone but herself. I could go on, but this post would get annoyingly long.

Yes, she has her flaws. Running late and losing kids in the grocery store, as I've already mentioned.

But she never closed her child's head in the van window.

Can you guess who has?

It happened as we were arriving at soccer practice a few weeks ago. It's taken me this long to get over it.
Who am I kidding? I'm still not over it. That was a major adrenaline rush, I tell ya.

As I was pulling in to park the van, Carlo was calling on my cell phone to offer Linus encouragement and soccer advice. Mostly of the "have fun" and "keep your eye on the ball" variety.

Unbeknownst to me, Linus had unbuckled and stuck his head out of the open window. As I'm chatting with Carlo about what time he'll be home and what his award winning dinner will be (yeah, right) I start rolling up all the windows.
Now, I close the phone, set it down and continue rolling up the windows, and even give each of them an extra click, when I hear a gurgly noise from the backseat.
Now, Linus can be a very silly kid, so my first thought is, "what's that goofball up to now".
On the second gurgle, I look back and his head is being squished by the semi-closed window pushed up against his lower jaw.

"OH MY GOD!", I shout. I'm pretty sure I didn't say anything more colorful than that. It's what comes out naturally at these times.
Not that this is a common occurrence.

I plead the fifth. Anyway...

I quickly put the window down, he slides backward, plops in his seat, and the first words out of his mouth are, "I'm OK".

I'm all, "oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry! Are you OK!? Mommy's so sorry!" Kisses all over his head and face, checking for marks, bruises, etc.
He insists he's fine and can he go to practice now? PLEASE?

WOW, I could have run a marathon with that particular adrenaline rush. Usually, I drag a camp chair to the field and sit comfortably during practice.

This time I paced. And paced. And inwardly reprimanded myself the entire 45 minutes, wondering when Social Services would be arriving to take my children away.

So, no more talking and driving... er, parking.

Of course, Linus learned a little something from this also. He is much more careful to ask if he can unbuckle now.

And even though it's nearly impossible with those old crank-up windows...
Thanks Mom, for never squeezing my head in the car window. It makes me love you even more.

Scatterbrained

It has finally happened. I've become my Mother in yet another aspect of my life. In many ways this is a wonderful thing. Anyone who has met her could expound on this for hours. But, perfect she ain't.
For example, she was almost always late to pick me and my sisters up from school, church, friends' homes, you name it. Plus, and I have a complex about this to this day, she frequently sent me to find something in another aisle while shopping at the grocery store, and then she would disappear!! I was onto her after a while.



Me: You promise you'll be right here?

Mom: Yes, Natalie, just go get the spaghetti.

Me: Promise!?

Mom: Hurry up, and get the spaghetti! Erin, get that out of your mouth! Betsy, stop teasing your sister!

Me: Cross your heart?

Mom: Just go!



So off I would go, quickly as I could so she couldn't move too far. Running back to the place I left her, I would be frantic. She's not here! Spaghetti in hand I would quickly pace the length of the entire store, checking each and every aisle. Sometimes, I would run into one of my sisters who had been sent on a similar errand. I often wondered if she was tired of caring for five girls and was maybe trying to "thin the herd". I haven't yet resorted to this particular method of alone time but I'm not ruling it out entirely.



Back to how I have become like her. This morning I sent poor Linus to school out of uniform. According to the calendar sent out at the beginning of the year it was a no uniform day. I mean, I had it written in my agenda book and everything! To have had it written down... really, this is a big step forward for me.
Apparently, it was changed somewhere along the way. Thankfully, he doesn't appear to be as anxious as I was as a kid, so he'll probably survive this mishap with minimal psychological scarring, but still.
I try, as God is my witness I try, but things just get away from me.



At least my Mom had a few excuses. Like 5 kids, and working night shift for a while, then going back to school for a time, then 12 hour shifts, and did I mention 5 kids.

The good news is, I haven't lost anyone in the grocery store yet.

Target = Mommy's little helper

Yes, Target.

With a Starbuck's inside.

And no kids. Which means no obnoxiously big cart with extra seats. Yes!

It was great! Except that they didn't have the silly desktop paper holder thingy that fits my other ones. Or a cute autumn-themed runner for the dining table. Or the kind of shoes I want for Gus.
So, I guess not so helpful today after all.

And then, enter the crabby lady who, when I said quite nicely "Excuse me," gave me one of those *heavy sighs* and moved her cart one inch.

REALLY? Is there a rule I don't know about? Only one person in the Dollar Spot at a time?

So, I move forward with my cart knowing full well I will bump into hers. Because she barely moved it! All the while I'm thinking, "I don't why you're so cranky today lady, but do what normal people do and SAVE IT FOR YOUR FAMILY."

In my experience, Target shoppers are generally more congenial than that. If they are exasperated, frustrated, angry, or any other negative emotion it is usually aimed at the whining, screaming, yelling kids they have with them.

That's why, when I had the chance, I went without mine.

Yes, I started a blog

So, here it is.
Another blog.
Another narcissist talking about themselves.
blah, blah, blah. Or should that be blog, blog, blog?

I figure since I'm so bad at keeping in touch with my family and friends, maybe they can see what annoying minutiae I post here and then THEY can get in touch with me.
Then I'll chat with them about what's been going on and I won't be out of the loop.
As much.
Let's face it, I'll still be in the dark. They're almost as bad as I am about these things.
Almost.

Blogging seems akin to communication with someone suffering from Asperger's. Communication, but not on a very personal level...

Like marriage can be at times.

...but I'm doing it anyway.